일상을 살아가면서
(1) 하나님의 narrative 의 맥락에서 현 상황을 보는 눈을 항상 구하고
(2) 하나님의 눈으로 스스로를 돌아보고 반성(회개)하고, 
(3) 하나님의 narrative 에  발맞춰서 순종하며 살아가는 작업이 항상 필요하다.
 
지금 이 나이에 살아가는 일상은 더 이상 훈련이 아니라 실전임을 절실히 느낀다. 출애굽기에 나오는 가나안 정복전쟁에 비교될 수 있고 치열하게 싸워야 하는.    물론 지금 우리가 향한 '가나안'은 물질적 풍요의 땅이 아니라,  하나님 나라의 것들이 바로 세워짐을 의미하겠지. 
삶의 댜양한 상황 들을 마주칠 때, 지금을 어떻게 해석해내야 하는지 열심히 기도하고 공부하고 고민하고 생각하게 된다. 
지금 2024 년 5 월을 살아가면서 도움이 되는 것들 (아마도 리스트가 더 늘어나겠지)
(1) 책: The Practice of Prophetic Imagination - 읽고 있는 중.
(2) 책: Every Good Endeavor 다 읽었음
(3) Psalm 92 - 며칠 전 QT 말씀. 
(4) youtube 설교:  Counterfeit Gods => youtube 설교는 도움이 많이 되었고. 책 주문했음. 
(5) 책: passions of the soul - 읽으려고 함. 
(6) 책: Broken Signposts - 읽으려고 함. 
(7) 잊혀진 소망 (쟈크 엘룰) - 읽다가 잠시 휴식 중. 글이 어렵다.  아이아빠 추천으로 읽는데 어렵다. 
(8) 출애굽기
 
The Practice of Prophetic Imagination 에서: 
The destiny of Moses and Israel is to wait. That wait is marked by confidence in God’s fidelity; but it is by faith and not by sight. Moses can see the land of promise, but he cannot see how it will be given or received.
                                                                              ..................

On all counts, this narrative, with its move from wonder to wait, contradicts the narrative of self-invention, competitive productivity, and self-sufficiency. Israel’s life is a life that contradicts the way of the world:
•   Wonder instead of self-invention;
•   Emancipation instead of the rat race of production;
•   Nourishment instead of labor for that which does not satisfy;
•   Covenantal dialogue instead of tyrannical monopoly or autonomous anxiety;
•   A quid pro quo of accountability instead of either abdicating submissiveness or autonomous self-assertion
; •   Waiting instead of having or despair about not having.
At every accent point in the narrative, the tradition of Israel asserts that the dominant narrative of the world is not adequate and so cannot be true. It cannot be adequate because it omits the defining resolve and capacity of YHWH, the lead character in the life of the world.

3. In the New Testament and the Christian tradition, the ancient story of Israel is retold with reference to Jesus. This is not to say it is a better rendering that supersedes that of Israel; of course not. It is only to recognize that it is a different rendering, but one that cannot be understood without reference to the more ancient rendering. In Christian tradition,
•   The wonder of creation is cast as the wonder of Christ’s birth, surrounded by angels and guiding star;
•   The requirements of covenant are exhibited in the public ministry of Jesus and in his summons to discipleship. As Israel is called at Sinai to a distinct identity, so Christ’s call to discipleship is a summons to join his alternative practice of reality. Because his summons contests the dominant regime (the empire of Rome), he was executed (crucifixion) by the empire through which the dominant narrative has its Friday moment of prevailing.
•   His resurrection (and ultimate return in power) is an act of waiting on the part of the church for gifts that are yet to be given and promises that are yet to be kept.
I have no wish to force Israel’s narrative into the categories of Christian formulation or to insist on exact counterpoints between the traditions. My intent is only to suggest that the ancient narrative of Israel—retold in Judaism—and the Christian rendering of the same narrative share, in the face of the dominant narrative, a peculiar narrative made peculiar by the character who occupies center stage.28 It is, of course, impossible to tell this story without the defining agency of YHWH who is decisive in every point of the story. It is for that reason that every critical attempt to discern or “explain” the story on historical grounds is bound to be inadequate and to fail. There is no story without the character of YHWH. At the same time, we must recognize that the telling of this story is an enormous act of imagination. It is on the lips of the storytellers that YHWH takes on life. It is always easy enough for adherents of the dominant story to dismiss this alternative narrative because YHWH, the defining agent in that narrative, does not even register in the categories of the dominant narrative. Thus it is the work of endless reperformance to continue to make this alternative account of reality available and persuasive. It is for that reason that the narrative itself, in Exodus 12–13, takes such care to instruct about the proper reperformance of the narrative at Passover. It is for the same reason, moreover, that Paul twice underscores the traditioning process alive, once with reference to the crucifixion-resurrection and once with reference to the Eucharist as the matrix for the narrative (1 Cor. 11:23–26; 15:3–8). Prophetic preaching depends upon the regular reperformance of this narrative that presents YHWH, the agent of wonder and nourishment, the giver of commandments who presides over our waiting, as the defining reality of the world. It is this retelling that creates an environment for prophetic preaching. And where the narrative is not kept available and persuasive in all its scandalous force, prophetic preaching has little chance of being either uttered or heard.

Brueggemann, Walter. The Practice of Prophetic Imagination . Fortress Press. Kindle Edition. 

But, she argues, acedia, “the sin of the empty soul,” opens you to letting all the other sins be the motivations for your work.

It is one of the favorite tricks of this Sin to dissemble itself under a cover of a whiffling activity of body. We think that if we are busily rushing about and doing things we cannot be suffering from Sloth. . . . Gluttony offers a world of dancing, dining, sports, and dashing very fast from place to place to gape at beauty spots. . . . Covetousness rakes us out of the bed at an early hour in order that we may put pep and hustle into our business; Envy sets us to gossip and scandals, to writing cantankerous letters to the paper, and to the unearthing of secrets and scavenging of desk bins; Wrath provides (very ingeniously) the argument that the only fitting activity in a world so full of evil doers and evil demons is to curse loudly and incessantly: “Whatever brute and blackguard made the world”; while Lust provides that round of dreary promiscuity that passes for bodily vigor. But these are all disguises for the empty heart and the empty brain and the empty soul of Acedia. . . . In the world it calls itself Tolerance but in hell it is called Despair.

I find this point hits home as a brilliant exposition of idolatry. Without something bigger than yourself to work for, then all of your work energy is actually fueled by one of the other six deadly sins. You may work exceptionally hard because of envy to get ahead of somebody, or because of pride to prove yourself, or because of greed or even gluttony for pleasure. In short, acedia is the most subtle idolatry of all. It puts the cynical self at the center of your life. And when you do that you release all the worst vice and sins to be the main animating energies behind your work.

Keller, Timothy. Every Good Endeavor (pp. 229). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

So where does this true passion come from? Paul starts the whole chapter with, “I urge you . . . in view of God’s mercy to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice.” What is it about God’s mercy that, if you viewed it, would allow you to become a living sacrifice—into a person who died to your own needs, who stopped doing the work under the work, and who transferred your passion to God? The answer, of course, is Jesus, the ultimate living sacrifice and the ultimate form of God’s mercy. When you see Jesus suffer and sacrifice for you, when his passion is burned into your imagination, it will become very clear whether the things you are passionate about are just forms of the other six deadly sins.

But why was Jesus suffering? Where was his passion and sacrifice coming from? In John, Jesus Christ looks at his disciples and says to the Father, “For them I sanctify myself” (John 17:19). The original word “sanctify” meant to set yourself apart like an Olympic runner. We know what it means to train for the Olympics. It means that absolutely everything in life is subordinated to one goal. It means that every minute of the day, every activity is done in such a way as to contribute to that aim. There is a great deal of pain every day, but it is endured without complaint. Only that level of passion and commitment can earn the gold.

And so it was with Jesus and his passion. He set himself apart for the goal of our salvation. He lost everything, endured everything, to obtain it. Jesus Christ’s passion was for you and for his Father—not for himself. There is our model. When the extent and depth of Jesus’s passion for you fully dawns on your heart, it will generate passion for the work he has called you uniquely to do in the world. When you realize what he has done to rescue you, your pride and envy begin to disappear because you don’t need to get your self-worth from being richer, cooler, more powerful, or more comfortable.

Instead of working out of the false passion of acedia, which is born of selfishness, you are working out of true passion, which is born of selflessness. You are adopted into God’s family, so you already have your affirmation. You are justified in God’s sight, so you have nothing to prove. You have been saved through a dying sacrifice, so you are free to be a living one. You are loved ceaselessly, so you can work tirelessly in response to a quiet inner fullness.


Keller, Timothy. Every Good Endeavor (pp. 232-233). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W7crLbtYEi4&ab_channel=CodyCarnes 

마태복음 6 장 을 또 읽어본다.

책에 다른 좋은 내용들도 많지만. 오늘 읽은 이 부분을 기억하고 싶어서 옮긴다.  매일매일의 삶에서 성령님의 함꼐 하심과 인도하심을 경험하지 않아 온 것은 아니지만... 그래도 더 적극적으로 성령님의 지혜를 구해야겠구나.

A Different Source of Guidance
   

 Most people think of faith and spirituality as consisting of doctrinal beliefs, moral behavior, and spiritual experience. So when thinking of God giving us a “moral compass,” they imagine a set of ethical rules and regulations, a kind of divine instruction manual from God for life. And it is certainly true that in the Bible Christians receive many practical ethical principles for how to live and many boundary markers showing us what behavior we must completely avoid. If that were all God provided us, it would be helpful, but insufficient. Because there is a whole category missing—wisdom.

        According to the Bible, wisdom is more than just obeying God’s ethical norms; it is knowing the right thing to do in the 80 percent of life’s situations in which the moral rules don’t provide the clear answer. There is no biblical law that tells you what job to take, whether to go back to school, whom to marry and befriend, when to speak out or hold your peace, whether to make the deal or walk away—yet the wrong decisions can blow up your life.

        How can we become wise so that we make good decisions? The Bible teaches that wisdom accumulates from several sources. First, we must not merely believe in God, but know him personally. When God’s gracious love becomes not an abstract doctrine but a living reality, it means our heart is less controlled by anxiety and pride, two powerful forces that constantly lead us to unwisely over- or underreact to situations. Second, we must know ourselves. Many bad decisions stem from an inability to know what we are and are not capable of accomplishing. The gospel keeps us from over- or underestimating our own abilities, because it shows us both our sin and God’s love for us in Christ. Third, we learn wisdom through experience. The foolish heart—blinded from reality because of its idols—does not learn from experience. In fact, the ups and downs of life can lead us to many false inferences. The proud person blames all failures on others, while the self-hater takes full blame for them even when others are responsible. Without the knowledge of God and self that the gospel brings, experience may teach us precious little; but if we know God and self, then time deepens our understanding of human nature, of the times we live in, of the power and use of words, of how human relationships work. All this leads to wisdom in decision-making.

       In the Old Testament, the best place to understand wisdom is the book of Proverbs. Proverbs is a rich resource for handling anger, envy, pride, and discouragement; for resisting the temptations of beauty, money, and power; for wrestling with the problem of self-control; for making decisions; and for keeping relationships in good repair. And what does the New Testament teach? It assumes all the Old Testament teaches about the nature of wisdom, but it gives Christians a new and wonderful resource to do what Proverbs calls us to do. How can we move from merely knowing about God to knowing God? How can we get deep insight into our own heart and the hearts of others? The answer is through the Holy Spirit, given to us by Christ when we embrace him in faith.

           The New Testament calls the Holy Spirit the “spirit of wisdom” (Ephesians 1:17) and “power” (1:19). Paul prays for his friends that God would fill them with “all the wisdom and understanding that the Spirit gives” (Colossians 1:9). When he speaks in the famous Ephesians 5 passage about being filled with the Spirit he calls his readers to “be very careful . . . how you live—not as unwise but as wise” (Ephesians 5:15–16).200 To be wise is to know how to best use every moment strategically. And this insight comes from the influence of the Holy Spirit, who also strengthens us to live a life worthy of the Lord (Colossians 1:11) and is referred to as a “spirit of power, of love, and of self-discipline” (2 Timothy 1:7).

           But how does the Spirit come to give us wisdom? Are we to sit in silence and wait to hear a voice? Not at all. In Acts 15 we see the leaders of the early church embroiled in a controversy over whether Gentile converts were required to keep the Jewish dietary laws and other cultural customs. In effect, they were wrestling with an issue of organizational policy. The text shows us that they debated and discussed matters intensely until they came up with a solution. Then they made a decision and sent it out to the church with the fascinating words, “It seemed good to the Holy Spirit and to us that . . .” (Acts 15:28). In other words, they used their best thinking and reasoning, their knowledge and their experience, and came up with a sound decision that they attributed to the Holy Spirit.

    Here then is how the Spirit makes us wise. On the night before he died, Jesus told his disciples that he would send the Holy Spirit and “when he, the Spirit of truth, comes . . . he will glorify me . . .” (John 16:13–14). The Spirit does not make us wise in some magical kind of way, giving us little nudges and insider tips to help us always choose the best stock to invest in. Rather, he makes Jesus Christ a living, bright reality, transforming our character, giving us new inner poise, clarity, humility, boldness, contentment, and courage. All of this leads to increasing wisdom as the years go by, and to better and better professional and personal decisions.


Keller, Timothy. Every Good Endeavor (pp. 210-212). Penguin Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. 

지금 다니는 교회에서 지금 gender and sexuality issue 에 대해서 다루고 있다.

자연스레 관심이 가는 이슈는 아닌데, 일상 속에서 만나는 이들로 인해서 관심을 가질 수 밖에 없는 이슈다. 

지난 주일, 교회 가기 전에 뜬금없이 이런 생각이 떠올랐다.  만약에 위의 이슈를 가지고 특정인들에게 돌을 던지는 이들이 있다면. 예수님꼐서는 요한복음 8 장에서처럼  "죄 없는 자가 먼저 돌을 던져라" 하시고 땅에 무언가를 쓰시지 않으실까? 

교회의 설교 말씀에서는 우물 가의 사마리아 여인과 대화하시던 예수님의 본문을 얘기했다. 예수님꼐서는 사마리아 여인과 대화하면서 truth 와 grace 를 다 말씀하셨다고. 위 이슈에 대한 설교 말씀의 요지는: 

• Truth -  창세기에 나오는 성경적 남성과 여성의 gender, 또 결혼의 covenant 안에서 이뤄지는 이성 부부의 관계만을 인정하지만,
• grace -  인간들 모두가 죄인이기에, 내 눈의 들보를 보지 못하고 타인의 눈의 티끌을 정죄할 수 없다. 하나님께서는 죄인인 우리 모두를 사랑하신다.

그렇기에 서로 포용하고 사랑하며 함께 은혜를 구하자 얘기였다.

그렇게 해서, 'truth' 로 성화 혹은 회복되자는 건지 어떤지는 잘 모르겠다. 사실 나는 교회에서 얘기하는 'truth' 가 백프로 모든 이들에게 해당되는 건지도 잘 모르겠다. 그건 내가 결론 내릴 수 있는 영역이 아닌듯 하다.  다른 이들을 포용하며 사랑하는 것까지 하나님의 사랑 안에서 우리가 할 수 있는 것이고, 그 이후의 것은 하나님께 맡겨야 하는게 아닌지...

굳이 위 이슈가 아니더라도 아주 사소한 것들도 다른 이들을 변화시키기는 정말 어려운 일이다. 특히나 누군가를 '성화'시키는 건 불가능하지 - 그건 하나님의 영역이지....

오래 전 접했던 다음과 같은 그림이 떠오른다.  겉으로 볼 때는 'grace'처럼 보이는지 모르지만 속을 들여다보면 'amazing grace' 그림 속 이들과 다름없는 이들도 많다, 아니 대부분이다. 그런 한 사람으로서 예수님의 amazing grace 를 세상에 reflect 할 수 있길 기도한다.