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2018.11.25 16:46

home as a safe base 카테고리 없음2018.11.25 16:46

<the self-driven child> 라는 책에 대한 기사 중에서 
(더 이상 child 의 부모가 아니라 young adult 의 부모라 할 수 있지만)

Can you please explain the idea of home as a “safe base”? 


Johnson: Just as in baseball, when you reach home base, you’re in a place where you can catch your breath and not have to worry about being pegged with the ball or being called out, home should be a place for kids to rest and recover. They are facing stressors each day, from school demands to social dynamics. You want home to be the place they can go to seek a respite from it all, where they feel safe and loved unconditionally, where they can fully relax, so that they can gather the energy to go back out. But if home is a stressful environment—if parents are an anxious or controlling presence—kids will seek that respite somewhere—or somehow—else. And most of the time, it’s a place you don’t want them to go. Or, if nowhere can be that safe base, they are really in trouble, as being chronically stressed is about the worst thing imaginable for brains, especially developing ones. That’s why we tell parents that one of the most important things they can say to their kids is, “I love you too much to fight with you about your homework,” and why we want them to move in the direction of being a non-anxious presence for their kids.


Posted by pleasing2jc

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